The day we moved out (see My Accident: Part 1) I was sat in the kitchen, boxes piled high. One of the removal men was already freaking out because he thought he saw his mate go in the bathroom but there was no one there. And then he says: “Could do with some music” and LO the radio alarm clock three boxes down started playing. I KID YOU NOT! Continue reading
I opened the window and a lady put her arm INTO THE CAR onto my shoulder and said “Its alright. Everything is going to be alright. You’ve done good things, it will all be okay.” Continue reading
I got up, turned the light on and sat there basically crapping myself (metaphorically) until daylight. Weird thing though, when I got out of bed and looked down my inner thighs were covered in lots of of tiny bruises. And all down my outer legs. Like little fingerprint size bruises. Continue reading
Anyway, at least it was my already damaged hand. Could’ve been worse, I didn’t nearly die this time! Continue reading
Ahhh it was probably dodgy electrics, right? Dodgy electrics that also caused the light switch to move as well… Continue reading
Part One: Never Underestimate The Power of Fear That’s what the scientist bloke said on the Battersea Poltergeist podcast with Danny Robins. That was his response to pots and pans flying around a room (often smashing against walls) witnessed by many people. Mate, if you only knew! I’ve had a… Continue reading
I miss my nephew. Have I mentioned that?(!) He’s going to be three in April and I haven’t seen him since Christmas 2019 when he was one. How’s he going to know I’m his favourite aunty if I never see him?! I rang my brother. “Can we just do a… Continue reading
For children, Sproutzilla Vs Christmas and The Return of Sproutzilla by Tom Jamieson are brilliant. Perfect for a Christmas Eve Box. Continue reading
I rang back and cancelled. Two days later she found out that both her and son were COVID positive. So the stepfather finally did do something good for me. His timely death might’ve prevented me catching it. Continue reading
Initially he was skeptical. ‘It doesn’t smell like food, what is she doing to me?!’ But by day 3 he was all ‘lather me up bitch!’. And now his paws and patchy dry bits really are silky soft. Continue reading